For years, you may have felt that something was wrong in your marital relationship. However, because you did not feel that the issue existed all the time, you may have shrugged it off. If the problem involves how you and your spouse communicate or deal with conflict, you may come to feel that the issue has become less easy to deal with over time.
If you often tell yourself that your spouse is not always bad or that he or she does not always escalate conflict unnecessarily, you may end up ignoring a serious issue. If you notice any of the following signs in your spouse, you may have married someone with a high conflict personality.
Raised voice
If your spouse has a tendency to raise his or her voice often when you attempt to have a discussion, this action may signify his or her attempts at adding stress and conflict to the situation. You may simply have brought up a minor issue only to find yourself on the receiving end of a loud beratement unnecessarily.
Overly opinionated
Though having opinions and sharing those opinions can help create conversation, a person does not always need to share his or her opinion at every turn. Often, individuals with high conflict personalities may offer their opinions as forms of criticism. Your spouse may have an opinion on what you should wear, how you should fix your hair, what you should eat or numerous other topics that have no significance.
Unnecessarily defensive
Someone with a high conflict personality also tends to feel defensive. Even if you make an innocent comment, your spouse appear to act like a victim of a personal attack against him or herself. As a result, you may find yourself taking extra precautions and watching what you say in order to prevent setting him or her off unexpectedly.
High conflict personality and divorce
Though you may have withstood this type of behavior for years, a time may come when you feel that your marriage no longer meets your needs or feels healthy due to your spouse’s tendency to create conflict. As a result, you may inevitably turn to divorce emancipation. While you may feel this option best suits your circumstances, you may want to prepare for the possibility of difficult proceedings as divorcing a person with a high conflict personality or other mental-health issues could easily make divorce proceeds more complicated than necessary. You may wish to consult with an experienced Board-Certified expert family law attorney in order to discuss the options available to you in achieving your emancipation through divorce.