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Will your spouse’s high-conflict personality affect your divorce?

On Behalf of | Mar 10, 2019 | Firm News |

As your divorce proceedings approach, you may have mixed feelings about the process. You may look forward to ending a marriage that has been filled with conflict, but you may also feel dread knowing that the conflict will likely fill the divorce as well.

One positive aspect that you may want to consider is that since you know you will face conflict during your legal proceedings, you may have a better chance of preparing for it. Though your preparations may not prevent conflict, they may help you feel less stress and feel more in control as you go through this period of your life.

High-conflict personality

If your spouse typically initiates the conflict, he or she may have a high-conflict personality. As part of your preparations, you may want to look into what personality type he or she may have. Four common high-conflict personality types include, but are NOT limited to, the following:

  • Narcissistic: Unfortunately, narcissists can be difficult to spot because of their charming outward appearances, but they are self-centered. As a result, your spouse may disregard your needs and only focus on how to help him or herself during the divorce.
  • Histrionic: A person who plays the victim often wants others to feel as if they have committed wrongdoing against the individual. If your spouse tends to exaggerate the extent of his or her perceived hurt feelings as a perceived victim, exaggerate your faults while minimizing his or her own faults, or may portray themselves as hurt by your actions while doing whatever possible to ensure that you do not benefit from the divorce, your spouse will be exhibiting traits of a histrionic personality disorder.
  • Controlling: You may have wanted to get out of your marriage because of your spouse’s controlling personality and the problems it caused. Unfortunately, someone with a controlling personality may create meticulous plans on how to fight you every step of the way during divorce.
  • Avenging: This final personality could stem from any of the three previously mentioned personality types. “The Avenger” type wants to make sure that you lose and feel hurt along the way.

People with these personality types already know that they can use certain tactics to their advantage, and if your spouse has one of these personalities, you can expect him or her to bring out those tactics during your divorce.

Having an advocate

Understandably, you may already feel as if you cannot win against your spouse due to his or her high-conflict personality. After all, that personality likely led to your divorce in the first place. Fortunately, you do not have to try to fight your spouse alone as you dissolve your marriage. You can obtain the help of an experienced Board-certified family law expert attorney in Collin County, Dallas County, Denton County or elsewhere throughout Texas to assist you in your aggravating struggle.